Thursday, April 15, 2010

Atomic Bombshells go hot for the championship, 78-58

The Atomic Bombshells defeated the Rockits in a thriller of a game - a Rockitbuster, if you will - on April 3rd at the Legendary Roy Wilkins Auditorium.   The Bombshells played their strategy to their utmost, summoning every resource they could muster to send their jammer to the front.  And though it seemed as if penalties in the pack might end their hopes to hold the Golden Skate high, the Bombshells emerged triumphant.

Harmony Killerbruise took the first lead for the Rockits, but Bombshell jammer Venus Thightrap forced her to call the jam by bypassing on the sprint to the back of the pack. L'exi-cuter, recharged from last month's break, found a way around Rockit blocker Scarmen Hellectra up front (who went to the box off an illegal hit), took the lead, and charged ahead for the first three points of the game. The Bombshells' Mae Gusta tore up the concrete for another lead amidst a light Rockit pack. Mae came back around for her first scoring pass, looked back, and found Harmony Killerbruise a breath behind her.  Mae called off the jam. 3-0 Bombshells.

Venus Thightrap took the lead via a gaping hole on the inside of the Rockit defense.  As she wound up for the lapping sprint, she found herself practically alone on the track; Rockit jammer Vuedoo Prodigy had gone to the penalty box along with two of her blockers.  Venus scrambled to take advantage for eight points, then called off the jam as a stone-faced Honeydew Felon knocked her to the ground. L'exi-cuter scored four against a boxed Vuedoo, but Vue put her Rockits on the board as she lanced past Flora Flipabitch to pace L'exi and score a single point. The Bombshells scored their fifth consecutive lead jam as Mae clawed past the aggressively lanky Killahertz and Scarmen Hellectra. However, Abbie Mischief actually scored more (4-2) on the jam. Harmony cut off the lead jam streak as she and L'exi went 2 and 2. 19-7, Bombshells ahead.

If the Bombshells were showing poise up to this point, they suddenly took a pratfall as Vue sped through to grab the next lead. Vue started her scoring run, and her opponent found herself in Vue's position from a couple of jams previous; heading to the box with additional Bombshells quickly in tow. The chairs in the penalty area filled with orange-wearing players, so many that at least one had to be waved off. Vue sprang through a decimated pack and grabbed fourteen. Finding a sweet inside line and beating on the wilted Bombshell pack, Harmony Killerbruise took the lead, scored nine, and gave the Rockits their first of many lead changes through the evening. 30-22 Rockits with six minutes remaining in the half.

Rockit veteran Scarmen Hellectra accelerated past Bombshell blocker Jocelyn D'Jewels to take the next lead. Mae Gusta camped in the back of the pack to deny Scar's path into the pack for the scoring run, but Rockit rookie Konceal'N Kari peeled off Mae to give her scorer a clear line to score five unanswered points. Two jams later, L'exi-cuter closed up the gap with three points as the Rockits miscued a pack destruction, giving L'exi safe passage and sending Scarmen to the box as part of the Rockits' illegal maneuver. Two jams after that, L'exi took advantage of Skullateral Damage's delay of opposing jammer Vuedoo Prodigy to take four more. At the half, the Bombshells had closed the gap to seven. 36-29 Rockits.

At the halfway point, the Rockits and Bombshells were both playing a fast pace, making few mistakes.  The match-up was tight; even the power jams seemed to mirror one another.  The Rockits were finding ways to capitalize on Bombshell mistakes, but the Bombshells weren't making many at this point.

Venus Thightrap took the second half's first lead jam amidst heavy strafing from opposing jammer Harmony Killerbruise. Once Venus broke through that pack, the Rockits sped up to delay the Bombshells' scoring run. Venus scored four, but Harmony caught up enough to steal one point. The Bombshells, showing an ability to play at the Rockits' fast pace, took the next lead as L'exi threaded a space not much wider than a dictionary on the turn. No points for either team. Mae Gusta grabbed the next lead for no points as the Bombshells kept playing to their strength: putting the jammer to the front above all else, even at the expense of their blockers going to the box.

With two Bombshells in the box and against a full pack of Rizzo, Abbie Mischief, Icepack, and Scarmen, L'exi-cuter had difficulty getting through for her team. Opposing jammer Vuedoo Prodigy came up aside, and L'exi tried to send her out. No such luck; Vue took the lead and scored three before heading to the box for back-blocking. L'exi shot through the pack on her first lap for a grand slam. 40-38 Rockits, thirteen to play.

With Vuedoo Prodigy still in the box for the Rockits, Venus sped through the pack unopposed for the Bombshell's fourth lead jam in the half. The Rockits seemed eager to speed up the pace, but the Bombshells skated steadily to catch the Reds ahead of the pack. Venus scored a double slam and the Atomic Bombshells went up by eight. Harmony knocked down the lead with the Rockits' first lead jam of the half and called off the jam after scoring three. Rockits called a timeout with ten left to play, 48-43 Bombshells ahead.

As play resumed, Vuedoo Prodigy jumped through danger, broke past a thin Bombshell pack, but did not take lead. Lagging just behind, Mae found her way through legally and called off the jam. By this time, the Bombshells were in serious foul trouble as orange blockers flew into the penalty box in ones and twos.  The Rockits took advantage of this and camped on Bombshell jammer Venus Thightrap in the next jam, delaying her long enough for Harmony Killerbruise to take the lead and bring the score to a tie, 49-49. The Rockits, led by Killahertz, did precisely the same job on Mae as Harmony took her second lead in two jams and scored nine unanswered points. The Rockits took their final timeout, presumably to plan their final set of jams.

Vue poodled herself into the penalty box as a blocker to clear out her minor penalties, and Scarmen went to the line for the Rockits against L'exi-cuter. L'exi started to attack Scar in the pack, but like Vuedoo, Scarmen stayed up. However, she skated into Jocelyn D'Jewels from behind and knocked her down. The refs sent her out, L'exi got the lead, and started sprinting out her power jam. Outrunning opposition at every turn, L'exi was assisted by her blockers slow-pack trapping Trixie Whipsum in the back. In all, L'exi scored nineteen points...almost a quadruple slam! With a lead shift and time running out, Venus Thightrap outskated the Rockit pack for the next lead against Harmony, and scored three before getting nailed by six-year Rockit veteran Pain Gretzky. 71-58 with two remaining.

Vue jammed against Mae Gusta, took the lead, and scored...but at the conclusion of the jam, the refs called for a timeout. Venus Thightrap stepped to the line as the referees conferred; it seemed that a back block had been called on the Rockits jammer, but the hand signal had not been seen by Vuedoo. After much consternation, Vuedoo was sent to the box, her points stripped. Venus almost fell over in shock and joy; only 1:19 remained on the clock, and if she could pull the lead, the game was practically over. Venus wound her way through the pack, and took that last lead. However, not wishing to take her last jam in safety, she charged right through the pack again, scoring five as Vuedoo returned from the box.

Just as regulation ended, Venus turned, saw the clock, and put her hands to her hips. In that motion, she completed the Bombshells' undefeated season. The Atomic Bombshells began the fifth season as a team of rookies and veterans open to new ways of play.  They won only two games in 2009.  Many of those players took no summer break and entered into a difficult All-Star season ready to learn.  Some never played as an All-Star, but they came out of the experience as a pack capable of taking on all comers.  That drive gave them the Golden Skate and a winning streak that now stands at six...only three away from the Rockit record.

Final score: 78-58.  Congratulations to the Bombshells, our 2010 champions.  Keep coming back to the MNRG website for updates on the upcoming All-Star break, as well as all the news on Season 7.  Ladies and gentlemen, we will see you in October.  

187 L'exi-Cuter (6-10) 40 pts
55 Venus Thightrap (5-10) 34 pts
456 Mae Gusta (3-7) 4 pts

75 Harmony Killerbruise (8-12) 27 pts
LXIX Vuedoo Prodigy (3-11) 22 pts
28 Scarmen Hellectra (1-2) 5 pts
318 Abbie Mischief (0-2) 4 pts

Reporting from where all the women are strong, all the men are accessories, and all the children turn left,
-Garrison Killer

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